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Rewrites and Cuts

I finished the first draft of the sequel, Through the Mist: Reunion, a few weeks ago. Right now, I am in what I call Phase Two, where I add all the missing details and embellish the story. I look for typos. I look for inconsistencies. Part of this process also involves cutting sections that simply do not make sense or grind the story to a halt.

I did not intend to have a prologue or epilogue. As I go through this process, though, I am second guessing that decision. I wrote the bit that follows this post. In its present location of the story, it would be a flashback. Now, I am not so sure. Maybe it would be a better prologue?

What are your thoughts?

Excerpt from Through the Mist: Reunion:

She would never forget the morning when Mrs. Douglas opened the door to Tilly’s room. It was almost 11:00 a.m., far too late for her friend to be sleeping. They found the garden doors wide open and dying embers in the fireplace hearth. A half full glass of Scotch rested on a table.

Beth searched Tilly’s room and found her friend’s wallet, passport, and cell phone. No sign of the woman herself, though. Where had she gone?

Mrs. Douglas rang the police straight away. They refused to do anything until Tilly had been gone for 24 hours. They told Beth that her friend could have gone for a walk and would be back before nightfall. She knew better. She waited in agony as the hours ticked by on the grandfather clock in the parlour. When the clock struck midnight, she felt each ring like a blow to her body. Something was terribly wrong.

The police scoured the area. They found footsteps leading to the forest. Then, the trail abruptly disappeared. She remembered hearing one of the police officers whisper fey. Later that evening, she looked up the word and laughed aloud. It was preposterous to think that a supernatural creature could have kidnapped her friend.

Months passed without a hint, no trace. Beth privately wondered if the police officers were right. Sometimes, the most extraordinary theory is the only logical conclusion.